relationship with an alcoholic

How To End A Relationship With An Alcoholic

Approximately 15 million Americans are diagnosed with AUD, or alcohol use disorder. Percentage-wise, that’s about 5% of the population, and that’s just diagnosed instances. By sex, about 10% of adult males and 4% of adult females are diagnosed with AUD.

An area almost unrepresentable by statistics, however, is the number of people that alcoholism affects. Parents, children, friends—any number of which for any one of the 15 million—are involved to some degree with alcoholism that isn’t even their own. Among them, nobody is more directly and intimately impacted than partners and spouses of alcoholics. At a point, alcoholism might be such a burden on the relationship that it’s better to end it outright.

If you’re in a relationship with an alcoholic, and unsure of whether or not persisting is even the right choice, you should consider whether or not your health, safety, and comfort is being prioritized. At Promises, we provide help and lifelines to alcoholics and the people they’re closest to. Call us at 855.298.3104 to learn about our alcohol detox centers in Washburn and across the nation, where you can take the next steps to address alcoholism, ask the questions that matter most, and decide whether the relationship you’re in is best for you.

What It’s Like Dating an Alcoholic

Dating an alcoholic can initially be an attractive offer. Alcohol is a number of things, one of which is indisputably a sort of social catalyst. It’s easy to chat over a drink, you might’ve even met your partner over one yourself. However, alcohol’s very nature introduces some level of impaired decision-making into the mix. Everyone manages this risk differently, but many have to consider that the choices they make drinking have ramifications outside of themselves.

In a romantic relationship, your partner’s decisions have the potential to affect you more than anyone else. You are both uniquely vulnerable to each other’s choices, and when those choices can be impacted by alcoholic tendencies, you have some cause for concern as to how your partner’s alcoholism could affect your well-being or contentment. 

Alcoholics can present themselves as high functioning—that is, they can hold a job, be cordial to guests and maintain hygiene like anyone else. Whether deliberate or not, though, most are seriously misrepresenting the scope of their addiction, either to themselves or others. Not only is this troublesome for a relationship where honesty and clarity should be of the utmost importance, it also adds unpredictability when it comes to reading your partner’s emotions. It can feel like everything is much more tense, anxious, and frail, and that’s a sign help is needed.

How to End Your Relationship With an Alcoholic

These are some of the principles to keep in mind when exiting a relationship with someone you intend to keep on good terms:

  • Prepare in advance what you’ll say
  • Say it in person if possible, somewhere comfortable
  • Be respectful
  • Make a decisive break, and never go back on it

Ultimately, the decision to do so lands on you. In situations where physical, sexual, or emotional abuse is ongoing, it’s absolutely best to find a way out. If not, talk to a counselor and your partner about what the relationship means to you, and how alcoholism is negatively impacting it. Weigh the costs and benefits and, if you decide it’s the best choice, end it tactfully and safely, most of all.

Resources Available at Promises Washburn House

Choosing to end a relationship is a difficult choice. If you feel like it’s the right choice to end a relationship with an alcoholic, Promises Behavioral Health has the resources and aid you need. The earlier something like an adverse relationship with alcohol is addressed, whether it’s yours or your partner’s, the easier it can be to overcome. To learn more about what we offer at Promises, contact us today at 855.298.3104.

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